It's been three weeks

...since I posted about "Getting Out There," so I thought I'd give a bit of an update (though, don't get too excited as there's not much tangible or exciting to report yet).

Twenty days into my month's trial on eHarmony and I'm not all that excited about what I've encountered yet...but, I have learned a few things....

The long and short of it is that apparently in a 300-mile radius from my city, there are (at least/so far) nearly 200 guys with whom I'm potentially compatible. Ha. ;) Of those nearly 200 guys, I've communicated with maybe about 10 of them....but the communication hasn't gone much further than a few questions back and forth.

I could tell individual stories about different things I've encountered but it's not really necessary. Instead, here's what I've observed and/or learned about myself:

• It's VERY flattering to be noticed by guys. It definitely makes a girl feel good.
• While I love children and can't wait to have many of my own (biological, adoptive and foster), I'm DEFINITELY not interested in being with a guy who already has kids. I want to be the center of some guy's world for a while. THEN we can have kids. Relationships are hard enough when it's just two people trying to figure things out...having innocent children in the mix from the beginning only adds to it.
• I'm EXTREMELY picky. Of those nearly 200 guys, there are only about five who've legitimately made me stop and think, "hmmm. this guy sounds interesting." And, of the five, ONE has stopped me dead in my tracks. (Unfortunately, that ONE hasn't made any contact with me yet - but I'm actually fine with it but don't feel like going into the details here).
• I feel a bit shallow....but, seriously, even if a guy's profile sounds somewhat interesting, if he's not physically attractive to me, there's no chance something's going to work out between us. (And, I'm SURE some of the guys I've been matched with think the same thing of me, and that's FINE.)
• If a guy is too eager to talk with me (sending multiple emails before I can even respond to the first one), it's a TOTAL turn off....(unless, of course, I'm really into the guy...which hasn't happened yet). :)
• So far, the only guys to initiate conversation with me are exactly the kind of guy I'm NOT interested in. I don't know how to explain it...but so far, it seems like only the super needy, insecure or mousey guys are the ones contacting me. Bleh. Where are the confident, humble, self-assured, normal guys?

Maybe I'm being too picky. I mean, I realize I just said above that I am picky. But, seriously, this is nothing short of disappointing so far. I know I have to be patient...but it's hard when I know exactly what I want and am just not finding it (yet). I suppose it's good to get practice - either talking with guys and to really realize what I want and don't want.... but, again, I already know what I'm looking for and am just not finding it. I don't think I'm being closed minded...I just really think I haven't found "him" yet.
Anyway, it's only been three weeks...but so far, I'm in no better position than I was before I spent the time and money on this silly online-dating website. Not convinced it's worth paying for another month.  : (